In more than 20 years, I’ve spent $0 on marketing and built my practice entirely through referred high-net-worth introductions.
I don’t host seminars, run ads or chase leads. Instead, I consistently generate five to seven new opportunities from every client engagement.
The key is simple: Change how you think about — and ask for — referrals. This has worked for me 100% of the time.
Reframe the conversation
The word “referral” can feel intrusive to affluent clients. It creates hesitation for both you and them.
A small shift in language can remove that barrier
Instead of asking for referrals, ask for favorable introductions. This phrasing feels more natural, more respectful and better aligned with how sophisticated clients prefer to connect.
Set expectations early
Don’t wait until the end of a relationship to bring this up. Set the expectations during the client experience. After a successful meeting or policy delivery, I position it this way:
I ask clients to begin thinking about people in their network who could benefit from what I do. I’m not asking for names immediately. Instead, I’m asking them to prepare.
Then I schedule a follow-up conversation a few weeks later, when everything has been implemented, to revisit the discussion.
This approach removes pressure and makes the ask feel intentional, not reactive.
Lead with purpose
Before I ever ask for introductions, I explain why it matters. This profession has a meaningful impact. The work we do changes lives — and because of that, more people deserve access to it.
When clients understand that perspective, the conversation shifts. It’s no longer about helping me grow my business. It’s about helping others benefit.
Use a simple story
I often share a brief example of a client who was frustrated that he hadn’t been introduced to me sooner because no one made the connection.
That story resonates. It reinforces the idea that withholding an introduction can be a disservice to someone else.
Make it nonnegotiable
I don’t leave introductions to chance. I consistently set expectations, follow up and ask for five to seven introductions from every client relationship. Not because it’s a strategy, but because I believe what we do is too important not to share.
Craig Myers is a 25-year MDRT member. He’s also a Top of the Table member. This was excerpted from his 2021 Top of the Table Annual Meeting presentation, “Riches were not meant for the meek.” (MDRT Court of the Table and Top of the Table member-exclusive content)
Expand your reach and find more clients with insights from this MDRT member-exclusive content:
yes. i agree this is giving clients in fact everyone a very “strong reason” why they should refer us.
This story reminds me of the story that Jim Rohn tells about one of his first meetings with his mentor Mr. Shoaff… When Shoaff asks him about a successful week, Jim expects that he’s asking for his sales numbers but rather Shoaff asks him, “How many people did you help this week?” Our business isn’t a sales business, it’s a “helping profession” were value is created by moving people in the direction that they want to go and achieving things that make them happy! When you help people get what they want you get everything you want in the end. Tom Levasseur.